A Barn Dinner Party

A few months ago I hosted a small dinner party in our barn for some girlfriends. I've been meaning to post the pics but you know how these things go, ha. 😂 I wanted to keep things simple for the sake of my sanity and desire to spend time with my guests. My dear friend Beatrice and I swept out the barn the night before and set up the tables. Our amazing husband's strung all the lights. The last thing I wanted to do was be stuck in the kitchen all evening so I requested that each gal bring a dish. It was the best decision. I served whiskey-pepper pork tenderloin with roasted garlic and rosemary blue potatoes. The spread was filled with everything from a tasty cheeseboard to fresh figs, salad, and even Chipotle guac (bonus points for Autumn!) I bought the tables you see pictured for a penny each at a public auction. The strung lights, glasses, and cloth napkins are c/o our Deeply Rooted supplies. The apothecary jars on the table were free items given from an old college lab. (I stuck twigs of fresh rosemary in them for table decor.) My friend Katie brought some gold flatware that she snagged at a thrift store. Autumn brought these snazzy wooden chairs. Marisa brought linen tablecloths, Claudia brought the bottled soda and some plates, and when put all together it all seemed to work well.I'm so grateful for the friends (old and new) that the Lord has allowed me to connect with since moving to Pennsylvania. They've definitely helped make this place feel like home. I'm certain we would have had just as much fun had we ordered pizza and sat on blankets outside but it was definitely an enjoyable experience to dress things up a bit. 😊 Thanks to Autumn Kern for taking these photos on my camera.

 PS. Can you see Skye? She is on the left side and is the second person closest to the camera. ☺️

God in the Dishes, God in the Details

After making it through another Monday morning laundry list of after school to do's, I was excited to finally be home. But when I walked inside, I didn't expect to see so many messes scattered around.  Didn't I just spend this morning cleaning this room? I glanced at our kitchen chairs -- the ones that I spent extra time wiping down this morning -- only to find sticky prints on them. And then there was our sink full of cups, plates, and other items. I had already dedicated a good chunk of my morning to hand washing the dishes that our dishwasher didn't fully clean. Now there was a new pile from lunch which would be followed by whatever would come dinner time. And then the usual afternoon squabble between Kaiden and Skye occurred. Time to go break things up, again. All the while Cora was walking around pulling things off shelves and out of cabinets.So much of being a mom is repetition and in those moments I just felt overwhelmed. So what does an overwhelmed mama do? She goes into the bathroom, locks the door, and cries a little. In my dramatic state, I felt a little like the Preacher in the book of Ecclesiastes:

Meaningless, meaningless. All of this is meaningless. I wash dishes only to make more meals and have more dishes to wash again. I wipe down tables and countertops and floors, only to repeat it all meal after meal -- and that's just the kitchen!

(I know the issue at hand is trivial -- and one that every mom faces, but I struggle with shifting from the complexities of a ministry  and then turning to children whose needs at this stage are much simpler -- like searching for lost shoes and trying to get non-washable markers off of objects.)So then my emotions kicked it up a notch. I began to ask God questions like: "God, where are you in these things? How do these mundane details fit into your plan? How are you possibly using me in this?" I have the head knowledge and can respond to those questions with great textbook answers (in fact, I just posted about the importance of motherhood here)

but in choosing to give into my feelings, I chose to let go of my theology.

Thanks to the conviction of the Holy Spirit, I soon recognized that I allowed my emotions to be my gauge rather than my guide. Feelings should be an indicator of my heart but something not to be trusted. My thoughts and reactions revealed my heart issues (like idolizing a clean house, amongst others). I also sensed the Holy Spirit reminding me that I'm feeling this way because I continue to do things in my own strength. Earlier I asked where was God in these details? He was there alright, I just wasn't allowing Him to be a part of it.And so I decided to get up and go fill my mind with something that would take my thoughts off myself and redirect me to truth. I turned on a song by the Getty's (awesome, modern day hymn writers with doctrinally sound and theologically rich lyrics) called Still, My Soul Be Still. The lyrics read:

Still my soul be still
And do not fear
Though winds of change may rage tomorrow
God is at your side
No longer dread
The fires of unexpected sorrow (I didn't plan or expect to be sad over something stupid but I was.)
God You are my God
And I will trust in You and not be shaken (Wow. I want faith that isn't ever shaken.)
Lord of peace renew
A steadfast spirit within meTo rest in You alone
Still my soul be still
Do not be moved
By lesser lights and fleeting shadows
Hold onto His ways
With shield of faith
Against temptations flaming arrows (It sure is tempting to wallow in self pity.)
Still my soul be still
Do not forsake
The Truth you learned in the beginning (How could I so quickly desert the things I know to be true about God?)
Wait upon the Lord
And hope will rise
As stars appear when day is dimming

I love the line that mentions "fires of unexpected sorrow". While there are so many more worse situations that I could be dealing with, the sorrow I felt over the state of my home was unexpected, indeed.   And so I prayed along with this song asking God for peace, steadfastness, and faith that cannot be shaken - even by my own emotions. I don't want to forsake the truths I learned in the beginning or to allow the temptation to wallow in self pity to win.Mothering is a beautifully arduous task but it's purpose is all about the long haul. It is a role that requires faithfulness, self-denial, and vision to see why we put the effort to train up our children (Prov. 22:6). I may not see the full ripening of fruit for several years but if I'm going to make it through the daily grind,

I have to be spirit led all the time.

I love the way a Bible study friend talked about her need for Jesus the other day: breath to breath. I need him day by day, moment by moment, and breath to breath.  This coincides perfectly with a message our pastor just preached on the importance with walking with Jesus throughout our day and how we shouldn't go for extended periods on soaking in His presence. By the power of the Holy Spirit working in conjunction with the truth we read in the Bible, He injects purpose into all things. And our purpose is to know Him personally, live in obedience to honor Him, and share the hope of the Gospel to all. But he not only gives us the purpose but He gives us the strength to endure. And so, the reality is that I need God in the dishes. I need him in the quarrels and squabbles. I need Him in the nose wiping and the sticky foot prints and the trails of messes. I even need him in the cleanliness. Whether mundane or complex, I need him in all the details. May His glory shine through it all.

My soul clings to dust; give me life according to your word! - Psalm 119:25

Random Thoughts on Christian Creativity (Plus, My First Time Weaving!)

"...the Father's gifts were never intended to be ends in themselves, provided solely for personal growth or enjoyment. Rather, such provisions were meant to prepare the Christian for her true vocation: a life of service to others, in the name of Christ. " - Miriam Huffman Rockness

I've been reading "A Passion for the Impossible: The Life of Lilias Trotter", a biography about an artist-turned-missionary and it's been stirring up so much in my soul. This quote got me thinking about the creative gifts that He has given to each of us. For many years I pursued various forms of art with selfish purposes but in more recent years God has opened my eyes to the realization that He is the giver of talents and He distributes each of those talents with purposes that extend far beyond our limited scope. Knowing this should change our perspective on why we create in the first place. Our talents should first and foremost be for His glory -- a reflection of the Creator Himself -- but they should also be used as a means of service to others, in recognition of our true vocation.Do not misunderstand, a Christian may pursue art as a vocation or hobby. I have plenty of talented friends making a living off their work just the same as any non-creative business would do. I also love new hobbies and crafting on the side whenever I get the chance. But I've known the addiction that the pursuit of art can bring. Art in and of itself should not be the end goal. If our lives are wrapped entirely around our tools, skills, style, and artistic goals, with little to no regard to the Giver of Gifts and His intents for those gifts, then it's time to do a heart check and ask ourselves what our purpose in life really is.Serving God and others, of course, will look differently for everyone. It could mean donating your lettering, design, or painting skills to a church, ministry, or charity. It could be using your photography skills for a couple or family who may not be able to afford much at all. It could be sewing or knitting things for local shelters. There are so many ways we can employ creative giving with our creative gifts. The question we must ask ourselves is: In what ways do You want me to give back the very things you've given to me? This quote reminded me to continually use creativity for His glory, to regularly examine my heart as I create, and to seek Him for ways to serve others in the process. There is so much more to be said on this topic but perhaps that will have to be a Deeply Rooted article. ;)On that note, I've been on a much needed "vacation" from DRM. I overworked myself this year and the time off has been a blessing in so many ways. This past week I was able to pursue something sitting on my personal to-do list. Wall hangings have been a popular trend for a while now and something I've always been drawn to. I actually attempted to make a DIY picture frame loom two Summers ago. I bought all the yarn and it's sat in my craft drawer ever since. (I blame that on the busyness/business, haha.) But Ethan got me a loom for Christmas and now I've finally gotten around to weaving!I struggled to get the initial steps down and had to ask Ethan to help me. (That's what I get for trying to learn from a E-book.) I'm so glad some of his military training gave him a foundation in sewing/knot tying between that knowledge and him watching some Youtube videos, he was the one to help me get started, haha! Once I got the basics down, I found this type of loom weaving to be so incredibly easy (and therapeutic.) Unlike my love for knitting, this didn't leave my fingers aching which made me happy. It sounds lame but I stopped knitting mainly for that reason.There is also so much freedom to create whatever design or color palette you would like. I didn't follow a pattern and just had fun experimenting with different types of string and techniques.I didn't realize it until seeing the picture on the right, but clearly my living room was inspiration without me even knowing it, haha.The finished piece is hanging in our living room (for now!) I'm excited to try out more complex techniques and to perfect some of the basics. :) I would love to have some sort of a looming get-together for anyone wanting to learn. I'm definitely not an expert but it would be fun to fill the living room with yarn, warm drinks, and both new and old friends. If you're interested, connect with me!