It's been over one year since I last updated this blog. I had every intention of sharing here more frequently in 2018 and it appears that was also my desire the year before and the year before that. My Instagram account has become a micro-blog of sorts but I do miss actual blogging and hope to utilize this space more in the coming months.
I do have valid excuses for the absence.
Around April of last year, I was asked to submit a book proposal. Authoring a book was not on my radar. It was unexpected, and at times I still scratch my head and wonder how it all happened. (The only answer to that is God.) I hesitate calling myself a writer. I know and work with authors whose sole focus is writing and have all the credentials. I enjoy the medium but it's never been a primary pursuit. I also am quite aware of my tendency to write in passive voice and stick, commas, in, all, the, wrong, places. ;) They tell me that is what editors are for, but the perfectionist in me still feels unworthy of the title.
Ethan deployed in June. We lived in Germany with him for a month, the kids and I spent a few weeks in Wisconsin and attended a family reunion. And then after prayerful consideration, we made a family decision and committed to a year of homeschooling. Kaiden still had soccer season, and I still had magazine making to do. By October, I signed a book deal and dedicated every last bit of free time to writing over the next six months. Those writing insecurities crippled me, and while I knew the task would be difficult, I didn't fully comprehend how hard it would be to break through the walls in my mind. God deserves all the praise for supplying me with all I needed to finish the task.
I submitted my manuscript March of 2019, and it's been on and off again, back and forth with edits since. The book publishes March of 2020. Maybe I will call myself a writer then, ha!
We wrapped up our homeschool year in June, launched issue 14 of Deeply Rooted, finished a young adults internship at our church, and just when I was looking forward to a slow Summer, we moved to Pensacola, Florida. We have been here only a few weeks.
Let me just set the record straight: busy is not always better.
However, even amidst a full schedule, we knew the Lord called us to a busy season and, oh, how it has stretched us and reminded us of our constant need of Him. We never imagined the changes He has called our family to. He took us around the world. He asked us to serve in unexpected ways. He closed doors, but He also opened other doors and uprooted us once more.
So here I am in a whole new season of life, ready to tackle some personal goals including blogging. I skimmed a few older entries and definitely cringed at some of the things I've written. Part of me wants to start fresh and archive it all, but I'm sure a year from now, I will feel the same way about this very post. This quote comes to mind:
“People throw away what they could have by insisting on perfection, which they cannot have, and looking for it where they will never find it."
- Edith Schaeffer
Through Jesus, I am being perfected, but I will not have perfection in this lifetime; therefore, I must lay down my impossible standards. My words are fallible. My execution is flawed. My consistency? Irregular. But I hope that this imperfect life testifies to my need for the Perfect One. So here goes yet another attempt at updating a little more regularly. Thanks for following along.